This was too funny, so I just had to post it. Anyone familiar with Kathryn's atrocious spelling will see the humour here.


Khalas says:
I should sleep too
Khalas says:
Before I turn into a zombie
choombi says:
deinfatelt
Khalas says:
LMAO "deinfatelt"
Khalas says:
and that was supposed to be definitely?
choombi says:
yes
Khalas says:
sweet
choombi says:
sah-weeet
Khalas says:
I'm posting that on my blog

So I finally managed to snag myself a Gmail account. It's pretty dang cool. The 1000MB of space is indeed quite liberating over the 2mb hotmail offers. I look forward to partaking of this new service extensively as time goes on.

So it's all been confirmed. I'll be in Cuba from January 9th, until the 16th, 2005.

Really looking forward to it, should be a lot of fun!

Ok everyone, I just completed a short story. Haven't really revised it a lot or edited it much. Most people know I'm a sucker for not editing my work. Anyhow, I was trying to practice some technical aspects of my writing that I think are weaker than others. Let me know what you all think.



Title: Mirror




Open your eyes.

No.

Open your eyes.

No!!

What are you afraid of?

I…I don’t know.

Silence. Waiting. He was aware of his own ragged breathing. His eyelids slowly parted, revealing darkness. He opened them fully. Pupils dilated, the fuzz washed itself away, and the picture became clearer.

Do you see?

In the darkness in front of him, he was able to discern a form. Black, pitched against a background lighter only by small degrees. So close he could have reached out and touched it, had he control of his limbs.

He focused upon the head, banishing the surroundings to the realm of unimportance. Eyes like a burning desert sun glared intently back at him.

Do you see?

I don’t understand. What should I see?

The eyes flashed impatience in front of him. Anger. So intense it seemed to burn, as though the rage housed in those burning coals had the power to flay the skin from his bones. He wanted to flinch away from the gaze, but it arrested him. Intriguing as much as terrifying. Familiar, yet distant.

What do you want?

I have what I want. What do you want?

The question shocked him, so unexpected it was. What do I want? He pondered. There was a difficulty in this, as in all things at this stage. He realized, suddenly, that he had no memory. The past seemed to have been enveloped by a shroud thicker than a storm cloud. Just out of reach, yet tantalizingly close. He grasped in futility. Heard himself grunt, although the effort was far from physical. Where are my memories?

They are hidden.

Why?

Because you lack understanding.

He stared at the eyes. They stared back. Molten orbs, he seemed to be simultaneously drowning and burning in their depths.

There was a noise, constant, grating at him. Static. Though he didn’t know what that was.

Show me.

A flash in the brain, like a shot of acid. His hands were clutched to the side of his head. It appeared he did have control of his limbs, after all. His eyes were closed now, staring inward. Still, through the images of pain, death, mutilation – each picture worse than the last, he saw the eyes boring into him. Could feel them, drilling into his soul.

The images had stopped, yet it was many long moments before he could open his eyes again, look upon the as of yet unknown once again. Sweat beaded upon his brow.

Who are you?

I am your family.

Family. The word triggered an emotion. Regret. He didn’t understand, didn’t expect to.

You are my family?

There are no others.

Surely, though, there would be others. Everyone had a family. Where had they all gone? How could this person be his only family?

What happened to the rest of my family?

There are no others.

Where am I?

Your home.

He tried to look around him, but every time he tried to look away, his eyes were dragged back towards the silhouette in front of him. Staring back, stealing his gaze, reading his thoughts. A familiar anger was boiling.

What right have you to imprison me in my own home?

You are not imprisoned by me.

Frustration. Confusion.

Then by whom?

Everyone else.

He grasped inwardly for understanding. Found emotions. Depths, depths of anger, deep wells of rage. Shame, and an unquenchable thirst.

What is the cause?

Your rage is caused by your jailors. Everyone.

The cloud over his memory was slowly lifting. There was a life, hidden in there. Work, a small apartment, a woman, and children. Screaming, yelling, crying.

You lied, I have a family.

There are no others. I am your family.

He wasn’t sure anymore. But it didn’t seem to matter. There was nothing positive in those memories anyhow. No joy, nothing pleasing. Only the anger. The helpless frustration. Images flashed through his mind, tainted red.

Do you see?

Someone had once told him that life was a circle. Without beginnings, without endings. Only repetition and perspective. He understood where he was on the circle, now. Perspective.

Yes. Perspective, and repetition. There is no ending.

He found he had the power to nod his head, slightly. There was an understanding here, tenuously held, yet held nonetheless. He looked at the eyes, savage, piercing, judging. Remembered thinking they were familiar.

Do you see?

Yes, I see now.

The eyes were, of course, his own.

The surroundings weren’t as dark as they had once seemed, either. Red, instead of black. Streaks everywhere, a pool on the floor. The mirror in front of him was cracked, pieces were missing. He hadn’t noticed before.

He turned around, stepped in the red pool. Didn’t notice, didn’t care. The static was from the television, in the room outside. There was red out there, as well. On the floor, the furniture, the wall. Even a splash across the TV screen, he thought there was an irony in that.

The voice was gone now, but he knew what it wanted. Knew what he wanted. There had been judgement in those eyes.

Life was a circle, without beginnings and endings. Yet he felt there was a beginning here, somewhere. He smiled, and walked towards the door.

Towards judgement.






2004, Bryan Clegg

For anyone who wants to see some...perhaps, misguided, individuals. Check out this link.

These people honestly believe they are non-humans. Belonging to such races as Faeborn and Otherkin. They talk about magical experiments, concentration camps and slaughterings of Elves (before they escaped the planet through a World Gate) and all kinds of other...perceived realities. It's not just roleplaying either. There are games where people role play like this in real life, but these are the folks who join those games to feel "normal" again.

Oh, to live in a dream world.

Been on midnights this week, hasn't been bad at all though. Just trying to sleep during the day is bothersome when people keep making noise that wakes a guy up.

Shaun and I hit upon a plan last night though. Since we finished all the contour orders halfway through the night, and found ourselves gluing pieces for the final 4 hours, we thought perhaps if the extra contour work has been completed - maybe we can switch back to afternoons today. Last night was the 4th shift this week, so come home in the morning, sleep for a few hours, go back in the afternoon - finished the full week of work by Thursday night, meaning a 3-day weekend. We ran the idea past Randy this morning, but he has no idea what the workload is looking like. Told us to call back at 2pm to find out what's going on. It would be pretty cool if it works out. I guess we'll find out in about 6 hours.

2500+xp Overclocking Results

Here it is, the results of my overclocking endeavors. I've spent the last 5 hours working on my computer, running stress and benchmark tests for every little increase. I'll post the stock settings, then what I did to overclock, and then I'll post a before and after of benchmark scores.


Athlon 2500+xp @1.833Ghz/333mhz FSB (166 x 2)
Radeon 9800 Pro: Core clock@ 378Mhz, Mem clock @ 338Mhz
FSB/DRAM Ratio @ SPD
Memory Timings: Normal
VCore: 1.550V

Temperatures:
CPU: Idle 31`C Load 35`C
GPU: Idle 34`C Load 37`C

Alright, so the first thing I did was my benchmark tests. I actually, foolishly, forgot to record my original PC Mark 04 score so I apologize but I don't have a number for that. I suppose when I drop my settings back to normal I can retest it and get a score then. When I do so, I'll update with the new number. I do have two other scores though.

3dMark 2001SE: 11398
3dMark 03: 4963/519

(As an aside, I'd just like the say that the Ragtroll test in 3dMark03 is rather a perverse mass suicide of trolls all jumping off a ledge, bouncing off other platforms and eventually lying prone on a floor a little ways down. Strange, to say the least.)

The first thing I did was go into the System BIOS and into the Advanced Chipset features. I changed the stock FSB from 166(333Mhz) up to 175 (350Mhz), along with the FSB/DRAM Ratio to 1:1. I switched the memory timings to high performance, and upped the VCore voltage to 1.5V in the power management section.

These changes yielded a modest clock speed increase, up to 1.928Ghz. After testing for stability, I went back and changed the FSB to 200(400Mhz). This was my overall goal. With the FSB running at 400Mhz at a 1:1 ratio. I also increased the VCore up to 1.650V. Note that my 1GB of Hynix memory runs at 400Mhz as well.

After this, my clock speed jumped impressively to 2.205Ghz. My 2500xp performing at the level of a 3200xp.

Next, I used the excellent ATI Tool to overclock my video card. First, I let it find the maximum core overclock, which turned out to be 430 without any artifacts occurring. With the core overclocked that much, the maximum memory overclock I could get while still remaining stable was 345. I checked one last time for artifacts, and set my speeds.

For a stress test, I elected to use Doom 3. I ran Ultra High Quality @ 1280 x 1024 resolution. It performed wonderfully, with only the slightest slowdown when fighting multiple adversaries.

I ran Doom 3 for half an hour, then decided it was moment of truth time. Benchmarks.

First though, I'll post the final settings and the temperatures under load.

2500xp 1.833Ghz (Stock) running @ 2.205Ghz/FSB @ 400Mhz
Radeon 9800 Pro @ Core 430Mhz, Mem 345Mhz
FSB/DRAM Ratio 1:1
Mem Timing: High Performance
VCore: 1.650V

Temperatures were still very acceptable. Thanks to my half dozen fans, and the Zalman intercooler on my 9800. GPU max temperature under load was a rather low 46`C. CPU max temp under load was 51`C. Temperatures at idle were 36`C, and 34`C, respectively.

Now for the benchmark scores:

3dMark 2001SE: 16006 (A net increase of 4608 points)
3dMark '03: 5798/527 (Net increases of 747 and 50 points)
PCMark '04: 3917

In conclusion, we can agree that overclocking really does pay good dividends. I'm also more than happy with the performance of my 2500+ chip. I've been touting it's overclocking capabilities for weeks now, and it's nice to see it live up to my bragging. Feel free to post your questions, or even your own benchmark scores.

Received confirmation today on my shift next week, I'll be moving to midnights to work the contour cutter with Shaun. Sounds like fun.

In other news, I'm working on two more poetic pieces at the moment. Both have a political slant. I'll post them if/when they get completed.

View from the lodge as the sun goes down on a fine evening.  

Lauren managed to rope me in for one quick dance before running off to play with the other kids.  

The five of us important type people 

Liam in his soldier's stance. 

Liam delivers his payload of rings to the bride and groom as Lauren looks on. 

There stands the whole lot of us, paying rapt attention to the drama unfolding before us, the ceremony led by witticisms courtesy of Wayne. 

Danny and myself sauntering our way along the aisle/path. 

This was the setting for the wedding, pretty cool. 

There's not too much to talk about, honestly. I've been doing more overtime at work the last few days, so that's been keeping me busy along with the gym. Today is payday, so I'm pretty happy to reap the rewards of all those extra hours over the past couple weeks - woohoo! I was thinking, if I get the time this weekend, I'll do some overclocking tests on my comp and post the results. So there's always that to look forward to!

I could post some wedding pictures on here, since I now have the capacity to do so. It's probably a little late, being that the wedding was a month ago. But hey, better late than never.

And here's the old comp, abandoned, and probably very lonely, after more than 6 years of stalwart service. We had some good times, she and I. (Note: Does anyone notice how sloppy the interior is, in comparison with my new comp?) 

The total package, I kept my old monitor 19", so it's the only item not properly colour coordinated. Pretty cool stuff though.  

This is the interior of my comp, notice plenty of room for further upgrades. Lots of cooling as well. I added some arrows and notations for those who really care.  

Those are my fan adjustment knobs at the top- gotta love the blue.  

I decided to post some pictures of my comp and the bitchin set up. This is my sexy tower with the speedstream dsl box on top. 

So, Ian McConville doesn't like Doom 3. That's ok. His complaints are kind of funny. He says it's too dark. How can scientists work in a dark atmosphere, he says, to those who seek logic in a game filled with hellspawned demons and other sorts of entirely believable phenomena.

Anyhow, went to a street party tonight for the Birch Leaf Walk and Stone Path Crescent folks. It was better than expected, actually. Met some interesting people.

Ah, the weekend. A time to relax, catch up on sleep, and do a hell of a lot of gaming :D. I am pleased.

Holy shit....Doom 3...what an experience that game is. Incredible graphics, the sounds, the atmosphere. I've been playing in the dark, with the surround sound turned up...I just died, and I have to admit - my nerves were getting pretty frayed there. This game is scary! I mean, you see how well you deal with it as you wander through these corridors, your com device going berserk with people screaming and dying and etc. Then all the lights in the room go out and suddenly some bastard helldemon is throwing fireballs at you. Then, after I blow him to bits and the body crumbles away in ashes, I open the door and a dead body flies past me, then another demon jumps out and starts peeling away my skin. How would YOU handle THAT?

That, in a nutshell, sums up my experience thus far of Doom 3...which is to say, about an hour or so of gametime. I can only imagine things getting better and better from here on in.

I got my new computer today...WOOHOO!!! It's bloody awesome. I put a game on, with settings on high, and it's as though a foot has come out of the tower and kicked me right in the nuts. Except in a good way, if that can be imagined. Take all the pain and feeling gathered from getting a hard boot to the balls, and translate that into a sensory explosion creating a state of euphoria. That's about how I'm feeling right now.

I'll try to not let my newfound joy and computing power inhibit my marginally regular updates. It'll be hard as hell to pry myself away from the plethora of games currently at my disposal to write updates for the faithful. I'll do my best.

Speaking of doing my best, I was forced to work 12hrs today, leaving almost immediately after receiving my big black tower of goodness. It was hard to contain the je dois partir emotion I was feeling throughout the day. Then, in a move that'll doubtless continue to baffle me all through tomorrow, I agreed to come in early again for another 12hr shift. What the hell am I on?? Well, it looks like no sleep tonight.

So I found something amusing. It's a job predictor. You input your name, and it tells you what your ideal job is. Apparently, my ideal profession is a Suicide Bomber.

Click this link to find yours!

Not a lot is new at the moment, I'm still really excited about the new computer. I should be getting it within the next very short while. I picked up the Altec Lansing speakers today :D.

A few stats have changed on it. The Radeon 9800 Pro has dropped from 256MB down to 128MB. I checked around and found a lot of benchmark test reports that ranked the 128MB with the same FPS as the 256MB card on every application at any resolution. In some cases, the 128 actually outperforms the 256 by 1 or 2 FPS- more often in the resolution range 1024x768 and down. The 256 doesn't come out on top until resolution reaches 1600x1200 levels - and even then by only 1 or 2 FPS. With all that in mind, I decided to save myself the $56 difference, and get the 128MB card. So what did I decide to do with that extra cash? I added a Zalman ZM80D-HP with aZM-OP1 fan! Extra cooling for the mega-heat producing 9800 = superior overclocking and performance.

w00t!

So, it looks like I'm buying a new computer - finally! I hope everyone is interested in the stats, because I'm about to post them. :D

Processor: AMD XP2500+ (This is good because these not only are good fast processors, but have great overclocking capability)
Memory: 1GB DDR 400 Hynix (2x512MB Matched Pair)
Mainboard: MSI Delta-L
Cooling: 4xPanflo Fans, Vantec Fan Bus, Thermalright Heatsink
Video Card: ATI 9800 Radeon Pro 256MB
Case: AOpen H600 Black
Power Supply: Enermax 350W Dual Fan
CDRW: AOpen 52x24x52x Black
Hard Drives: 160GB WD Special Edition 7200 RPM 8MB Cache (2x80GB)
Sound: On Board
Speakers: Altec Lansing 5.1 Surround
Keyboard/Mouse: Logitech MX Cordless Duo

Software/Games: Win XP Pro, and a crapload of games and other software all included.

I dropped the monitor from the system because I'm just going to keep using the 19" I have right now, and save up for perhaps an LCD in the future. The total price is low: $1900. That's tax included.

I'm happy...so very happy, to finally be getting a new computer! woooooohoooo!!!

The soccer game tonight was great! Over 50,000 people came and witnessed the defeat of Celtic 1-0 at the hands of AS Roma. The game was plenty entertaining - lots of action with good chances, good saves, and even a few crazed fans running onto the field - one escaped, the other got dragged away in handcuffs.

The atmosphere was pretty impressive too. Both Celtic and Roma supporters spent plenty of time destroying their vocal chords with chants, whistles, and screams of pleasure or displeasure. It wasn't quite on par with the game I saw part of at Celtic's home stadium in Glasgow. But I'm more than willing to say that Toronto made a damn good showing of itself tonight. I'm pleased.

Both teams supporters walked away from the match happy - I'm especially pleased with the thousands of Celtic supporters who walked around downtown singing team chants and banging drums both before and after the match. Those fellows really helped make the experience that much more enjoyable. (The Roma fans were good as well, but they saved the majority of their vocals for inside the stadium, as opposed to the more rowdy Celtic fans.)

I'll upload some pictures soon as I get my cable for the camera back. Hopefully in the not-so-distant future.

I'm also really looking forward to next years ChampionsWorld matches, but in the meantime - I'll be supporting the Toronto Lynx - Toronto's A-League soccer club.